Business Entertaining & Dining Connie Ghuman
Taking Your Seat and Napkins To seat yourself: approach the right side of the chair and enter it from your left side. When the meal is over, push your chair back from the table. Rise and exit from the right side (the same side that you entered), and push your chair under the table. If you don t push your chair under the table, it can be an obstruction to the waitstaff and other diners. Note: at business meals, a woman never expects a man to seat her. She seats herself. However, if a man offers to seat her, she accepts with a gracious thank you. Napkins: When you are seated at the table, pause briefly and look around at the other diners at your table before picking up your napkin. The table host leads the way and picks up his or her napkin first. Remove the napkin from the table and place it in your lap, then unfold it in your lap. Never snap the napkin open in mid-air. Large dinner-sized napkins can be folded in half, with the fold facing your lap (open side close to knees.) Smaller lunch-sized napkins can be completely unfolded in the lap. When you leave the table briefly, push your chair away from the table, rise and exit from the right side of the chair. Place your napkin on the chair seat, or back of the chair, and push your chair under the table. When you return, pull the chair away from the table, pick up your napkin, seat yourself, and return the napkin to your lap. In upscale restaurants, the waitstaff may refold your napkin and place it on your chair. At the end of the meal, you do not refold your napkin. Simply pick it up by the center and place it loosely to the left of the plate. The napkin is used as a silent signal to end a meal. The table host will pick up his or her napkin, signaling that the meal is finished. 2
Eating Soup The soup spoon is held the way a pencil is held, steadied between your index finger and middle finger, except that the thumb is turned up rather than down as when one is writing. Soup is spooned away from you toward the center of the soup plate. Sip the soup from the side of the spoon. The soup plate may be tipped away from you in order to fill the spoon with the last sips of soup. Place the spoon on the soup plate when you are resting, and place the spoon on the soup plate when you have finished in the 10:20 I am finished position. Never leave the spoon in the bowl. 3
Asian Style of Dining -- Eating with Chopsticks The efficient use of chopsticks will speed up once you understand the following principles. Practice holding the chopsticks one at a time. Cradle the bottom (stationary) chopstick in the hollow of your thumb, with the narrower end resting on the third finger. Firm up your grip of the bottom chopstick by using your upper thumb to press the chopstick securely against the tip of the fourth finger. Left-handed persons may reverse the position. Add the second chopstick and hold it like you hold a pencil when writing. Make sure the chopsticks are evenly lined up. Hold the first chopstick in the original position and move the second chopstick up and down. The lower chopstick never moves while in operation. It remains stationary at all times, serving as a base on which to clamp the food placed on it by the top chopstick. Tips: _ Do practice using chopsticks by picking up popcorn. _ Never stand chopsticks in a bowl of rice. _ Never point your chopsticks at someone. _ Do remember to use the large ends of your chopsticks to serve yourself from a platter. _ Never eat food directly from a platter always place the food on your plate first. _ Don t cross the chopsticks. When not in use, place the chopsticks side-by-side on the chopstick rest. _ Do remember that a banquet can last two or three hours, and may include twelve or more courses. 4
American Style of Dining This illustration shows how to hold the knife and fork to cut food. Food is cut the same way in both the American and Continental styles. Hold the knife in your hand with your index finger on the handle, overlapping the blade no more than 1-inch. This is necessary because you need leverage for cutting. Hold the fork, prongs down, in your hand. Cut only one piece of meat at a time. After cutting the meat, lay the knife on the plate, as shown in the illustration. The cutting edge of the blade always faces the center of the plate. Switch the fork to your right hand before raising it to your mouth. The fork is held the way a pencil is held, steadied between the index finger and the middle finger, except that the thumb is turned up rather than down, as when one is writing. Left-handed persons may reverse the position. Resting I am finished position Notes: 1. In the American style, the tines of the fork are up. 2. In the American style, your hands are in your lap when not in use. 5
Continental Style of Dining This illustration shows how to hold a knife and fork to cut food in either the Continental or American style. Cut only one piece of meat at a time. Bring the fork, tines down, to your mouth by twisting your wrist and raising your forearm slightly. The knife remains in your hand. A small amount of potatoes, rice, or vegetable may be placed on the tines of the fork with the meat. Resting I am finished position Notes: 1. In the Continental style, the tines of the fork are down. 2. In the Continental style, your hands may rest on the table from the wrist up when not in use. 6
Bread and Butter Plate The butter knife is placed across the top or on the right side of the bread plate. Always break the bread with your fingers. Break off one bite-size portion of your bread or roll at a time, then butter and eat it. Do the buttering on your plate, never in midair. Salad Course The salad may be eaten with the salad fork and knife. You may leave the knife on the table if the salad can be easily eaten with the fork alone. When you have finished this course, place both utensils on the plate in the I am finished position. Dessert with a Fork and Spoon Dessert may be eaten with the fork in the left hand, tines down, and the spoon in the right. Eat with the spoon. The fork can serve as a pusher. Eat pie or cake with a fork; use the spoon for ice cream or pudding. Leave the other utensil in place on the table. Place both utensils on the plate when you are finished in the I am finished position. The bowl of the spoon is up and tines of the fork are down. 7
Place Setting Map Six Course 8
The Top Dining Dos Do avoid talking with your mouth full. Take small bites, and you ll find it s easier to answer questions or join in table talk. Do wait until you have swallowed the food in your mouth before you take a sip of your beverage. Do take a quick sip of water if a bite of food is too hot. Do remember solids (food) are always on your left, liquids (beverages) are on your right. Do leave your plate where it is when you have finished eating, with the knife and fork in the 10:20 I am finished position. Place the tips of the utensils at 10 and the handles at 4. Do look into, not over, the cup or glass when drinking. Do butter bread on the plate, never in midair. Do remember your posture at the table. Sit up straight, and keep your elbows off the table. Do leave dropped silver on the floor. Quietly signal the waitstaff to bring another piece. Do point out to your waitstaff anything that is not right with your food, but do so in a noncombative manner. You ll get a replacement immediately. Do remove an object such as a bone or gristle from your mouth discreetly using your napkin. The Top Dining Don ts Don t, in serving, overload your plate. Don t, in eating, overload the fork. Don t mop your face with your napkin. Don t spread your elbows when cutting meat. Keep them close to your sides when eating. Don t saw the meat in a back and forth motion. Stroke it toward you. Don t chew with your mouth open. Don t smack your lips. Don t touch your face or head at the table. Don t reach across the table or across another person to get something. If it s out of reach, ask the closest person to pass it to you. Don t pick your teeth at the table, either with a toothpick or with your fingers. If something gets caught in your teeth, excuse yourself and take care of the problem in the privacy of the restroom. Don t push your plate away from you when you ve finished eating. Don t gesture with your knife, fork, or spoon in your hand. If you re not using the utensil, put it down. Don t talk about your personal food likes and dislikes while eating. Don t eat your neighbor s bread or salad. A right-handed person reaches to the left across the dinner plate to eat salad. The bread and butter plate is placed slightly above the salad plate. (Remember, solids [foods] on the left.) Don t blow your nose at the table. This is a bodily function and should be done away from the table. 9